How I found my self-discipline & productivity again after a spiritual awakening.
My spiritual awakening was a funny thing. I started to reject all the parts of me that I had spent my life cultivating:
– my discipline
-my productivity
-my daily routine
-my following a schedule
-my authentic expression
I only wanted to be in my “feminine energy” and didn’t want anything to do with all the masculine part that brings direction, purpose and drive.
In my desire to “be in flow” I lost all sense of structure. I justified this with spiritual jargon such as “time doesn’t exist”.
As a result my self-discipline went out of the window. And I paid the price:
-I lost my productivity
-I was unable to create my ideas
-I lost my daily routine
-I procrastinated
-I was indecisive
As if that wasn’t bad enough, I felt BAD about myself because I knew I could be doing more.
Recently my coach, Jeff Agostinelli, recommended I take a Strength Finder test by Gallup. It was life-changing.
I finally saw with my own eyes that one my my main strengths is being an ACHIEVER.
Achievers love to get stuff done; they love tasks; they are highly productive.
This changed my perspective about myself.
There was me this whole time rejecting the ACHIEVER side of me, thinking that in order to be spiritual we have to do less and be more.
And in the process I was damaging myself.
I had an idea that spiritual people didn’t need a schedule or deadlines or to exert massive amounts of energy to achieve their dreams.
And so I went against my self-discipline full throttle.
But here’s the thing.
Rejecting a part of us means we lose our integrity. We become less WHOLE.
This means we are unable to live up to our full potential because we are pretending a part of us doesn’t exist.
We are not living in integrity with our essential self and therefore we have less power to create.
“I am disciplined because I know the cost of not being”.
Jeff Agostinelli
When I realised this I started to turn it around.
-I got clear on my quarterly goals
-I translated those into daily habits
-I brought back a timetable.
-I worked to a schedule.
-I wake up early to make the most of the day.
And the consequences of refinding my self-discipline?
-I am building my coaching business.
-I am recording my album
-I am learning guitar, belly dance & voice yoga
-I am hosting singing circles in the city of Barcelona
-I am moving to the countryside
And most importantly, I feel good about myself
-satisfied at the end of a day
-fulfilled
-like my life is moving in the right direction
-like I can trust in my own capacity to create
Am I saying this to brag?
Absolutely not.
I don’t pretend that my life is perfect.
There is also a cost to self-discipline.
-I am extremely focussed, sometimes to the cost of friends and family.
-Sometimes I get stressed and I need to remember to REST.
-I often put too much pressure on myself to reach my goals.
But pressure is important in the process of creation.
That’s how diamonds are made.
I have experience both sides of the coin.
And I know that my life is easier, I acheive more and I feel better about myself when I cultivate my self-discipline.
Therefore I intentionally choose this every time.
If this is something you are also interested in experimenting with, I have put together a fail-safe method. Following these steps will hone your self-discipline and improve your productivity:
- Get clear on your WHY. Your MOTIVATION is the backbone of everything you do. Without it you will get lost. What do you want to achieve? I´ll give you a clue here: it’s important that this something you are passionate about or something that you yourself have suffered. This is the ultimate motivation and the only thing that can lead to profound engagement (more on this in the next newsletter).
2. Translate your why into a tangible goal: the WHAT. If you want to start a creative project where you can support other people with a particular problem, your goal might be to get your first client. If you want to start sharing your passion of singing, perhaps you want to start a singing circle.
3. Get clear on your WHEN. Pick a date and hold that in your line of vision so that your brain understands the timeline. This makes it more real and much more likely that you achieve it. Rememebr: where attention goes, energy flows.
4. REVSERSE ENGINEER. This is the fun part. Here you take your goals and then work backwards. You look at what morning routine and habits are going to support you to achieve these. If you want to start supporting people in a particular area, you could start a daily habit of reaching out to people in your network. Research will help you gain clarity about what exactly they need help with. If you want to start a singing circle, you could practise singing 30 minutes each day.
4. GET IT DONE FIRST THING. My own experience has taught me to get these done at the start of your day. Get your practice out of the way before you go on to other things. Get your most important work done first thing while your mind is still fresh. Then you have already achieved something. You feel good about yourself because your actions are aligned with your goals. You have a winner’s mindset that you can carry through to the rest of your day.
In summary
I want to remind you that the purpose of self-discipline is not to punish yourself.
Self-discipline does not have to cut your flow.
Quite the opposite actually.
Self-discipline gives you the structure you need to flow with more grace and direction.
I like to use the metaphor of the banks of the river. The water flows down the river, but without the banks of the river supporting it, the water would spill out without any direction.
So it is with life.
The water is you.
The banks of the river are your self-discipline and structure.
It might be fun for a while to live without banks.
You may feel “free” for a time.
But deep down you know that real freedom comes from a life that allows you room for your deepest expression.
And to express yourself fully takes commitment, direction and self-discipline.
If you would like some support getting your self-discipline in order for maximum productivity, or are looking to implement habits that support you moving towrads your goals, get in touch.
You can simply reply to this email or click the link below to book a call.
I hope you enjoyed my newsletter.
Love from Abbey x